Good day, Stoics.
Don’t turn a preference into a requirement.
There are plenty of things we’d rather have.
Good health. Enough money. Respect from others. A comfortable home. Plans that work out. People who treat us well.
The Stoics weren’t pretending those things were meaningless. They called many of them preferred indifferents. Given the choice, of course we’d prefer health over sickness, security over hardship, and friendship over conflict.
The trouble begins when “I’d prefer this” quietly becomes “I need this in order to be okay.”
That’s when preference becomes dependence.
We start telling ourselves:
I need them to understand me.
I need this plan to work.
I need today to go smoothly.
I need things to turn out the way I pictured them.
And suddenly, our peace has conditions attached to it.
Stoicism asks us to hold things differently.
Pursue what you prefer. Work hard for it. Appreciate it when it arrives.
Just don’t make your character, peace, or ability to live well depend on keeping it.
That’s freedom.
Not wanting nothing.
Not caring about nothing.
But being able to say:
“I’d very much prefer this. And if life gives me something else, I’ll work with that too.”
Stay steady.